Making Wise Family Media Choices

Someone asked me recently if I thought parenting was getting more and more difficult. Without hesitation my answer was “YES!” Though there are several reasons I believe this, my primary concern stems from the bombardment of media choices presented to families today. On a 24/7 basis, visual images and life messages stream into Christian homes through television, movies, music venues, video games, internet sites, books, magazines, and even cell phone usage. Most of those images are harmful and the life messages almost always contradict a biblical world view.

More than ever before, parents must stay informed of what their children are watching and listening to and what is going on in the culture around them. Because of the shear volume of media opportunities this is no easy task to undertake. I have cautioned parents not to go the easy “isolationist” route and simply say no to everything. There are two reasons behind this advice. One is that it relieves the parent of doing the hard work of discipling their children on how to live in a fallen world without being contaminated by it. Two, it can lead to violating the first portion of Ephesians 6:4 which says “And fathers, do not stir up anger in your children.” This can happen through placing unreasonable demands and restrictions upon children.

While there must be limits in every Christian home concerning media consumption, it is always best to have a clearly defined and communicated guide that everyone in the house abides by and understands. The following list of questions can help provide a “filter” for parents to use to help scrutinize media choices and also provide an avenue for discussing those choices with their children. This really helps when parents must say “no” because it shows your child that your decision is not unreasonable but well thought out and purposeful.

Questions to Help You Make Wise Media Choices:

 Would you consider the main characters to be positive role models?
 Does the overall moral and spiritual message contradict a biblical worldview?
 Are real consequences to sin exposed or is sinful behavior celebrated?
 How are relationships and love portrayed?
 How are Christians, religion, the church, the family, and God portrayed?
 Does the language honor God and people?
 If violence is included, how is it presented?
 How much and what kind of sexual activity is implied and/or depicted?
 Are the visual images dark, sensual, or gratuitous?
 Is the media (video games, television, cell phone, internet) consuming too much time that could be used more productively?

In closing, let me caution a couple of things with using this list. First, realize that parents will apply these questions differently while making media choices for their own family. Even using these common questions may result in some parents deeming a media opportunity as unacceptable while others may not. Second, you will never be able to completely shield your child from negative images and messages. For example, you may go to see an acceptable movie at the theater and then be inadvertently exposed to something unacceptable in the previews of coming attractions. The same goes for commercials on television. I suggest you use these times as teachable moments. *Third, some movies, TV shows, or books that may have slightly questionable content may be worth watching along with an older child or teen because it could provide a bridge to speak openly with them about the spiritual implications of the content.

The goal is to teach our children to develop their own media “filter”. We want them to leave our home some day knowing how to live in and engage a fallen world with the Gospel without being contaminated by it.

David

* Added on 3/30 - I felt it might be best for clarity to name a few movies or books that I felt would fall under this category such as: Remember the Titans, October Sky, Bella, The Chronicles of Narnia movies, The Lord of the Rings Trilogy, or The Rookie. All these have strong moral and/or spiritual implications that can be used to promote family discussions. Every parent should still discern the value to viewing them as a family and all are obviously too intense for younger children.